To Err is Cumin
by PrivatelyOwnedSpiralGalaxy
Summary: (Takes place roughly 8 years after the show) Tina, Gene and Louise all have to move out and move on, and they're having a bit of trouble doing so. Louise doesn't want to grow up, so her best friend, Jessica, tries to take her on a gap year to show her the world isn't that bad of a place, Gene has to deal with his new college housemates and Tina is struggling to find and hold a job.
1. Chapter 1 (Everyone)

**Louise:**

"C'mon Louise, we're finally free, you should be happy," Jessica mumbled, stuffing another spring roll into her gob.

"Yeah, I guess," Louise sighed, monotonically, seemingly distracted from the conversation.

"Dude, you've been standing beside the food table staring blankly into space for five minutes straight, this isn't like you," Jessica complained, though it was barely audible due to both her mouth being full of food and the pounding dance music.

Louise broke her gaze to look at the bubbly ginger girl beside her, so much promise and optimism for her future, she seemed so… happy. But Louise knew better. They weren't

'free', in fact, they were the exact opposite of free. Now that high school was over life was only going to get more complicated, and that was just the last thing she needed.

"Can you at least pretend to enjoy yourself? It's graduation, you're never going to experience a party like this again in your entire life," Jessica slurred.

The tables had certainly turned, normally it'd be Jessica unhappy about the situation and Louise trying to encourage her to be more care free, but not this time. Perhaps the sudden attitude change had something to do with Jessica being completely drunk, or because she had hated school so much that graduation was like a 'beginning of her life' sort of sentiment.

"Fine," Louise replied, half-heartedly. She figured she'd swallow her worries and have a night of fun for Jessica's sake as it's not everyday Jessica's willing to party and participate in any 'extroverted activities.' Louise smirked at her loyal high school friend, snatching a shot-glass from the table and downing it like there was no tomorrow, only to scrunch her face up in disgust due to the strong whiskey. Jessica giggled and grabbed the Belcher teen by the wrists, dragging her away from the table and into the mosh pit, the shitty music blasting from the speakers becoming the only sound filling their ears.

 **Gene:**

Gene took a deep breath and stared at the rosewood door, knowing behind that door would be the five housemates he'd be spending the next four years with. He was normally outgoing when it came to these sorts of things, but for some reason this time was different. Most likely because he'd been living with his family, the Belchers, for the past 18 years of his life and it just felt odd knowing that things were different now.

With all the courage he could muster, Gene was about to finally knock but then he hesitated again, this time wondering if this was even the right house. He checked the address, 29 Crescent Avenue, he was definitely where the letter had told him to be. But this house looked nothing like what you'd expect a house of college students would look like – in fact it looked sort of abandoned.

The paint was weathered and peeling off in some places, and the slats in the shutters on the upstairs windows were mostly broken out, not only that but the garden was overgrown, weeds practically covering the driveway. Gene wasn't much of a neat person himself, but even to him this was ridiculous. Either he managed to get the address wrong somehow and wound up at an abandoned lot, or his new housemates were a bunch of slobs. Either way it was a bad situation.

Gene realized he'd been standing at the doorstep for quite sometime and finally decided to knock. No answer. He tried again and just when he began to further doubt he was at the right place the door flung open revealing a lanky man roughly Gene's age with a knitted beanie and a navy blue David Bowie shirt.

"Hey man, you must be our final housemate, come in, come in," the man said, stepping aside to allow Gene to pass.

"Uhm – h-hey," Gene murmured, looking around. The house wasn't much better on the inside, syringes, empty beer bottles and an array of dirty washing scattered the floor and the room had a strong scent of B.O. Now Gene knew why the rent was so cheap.

Four more housemates sat in a circle, passing around a bong and taking puffs from their cigarettes, they certainly were not the type of people Gene normally hung out with. He was more of a 'band geeks' type of guy, which is why the one thing in the room that caught his attention was an old, worn out spinet piano at the back of the room. That could possibly be useful in the future, that is, if it was still usable and its strings hadn't been clogged from all the dust surrounding it.

"Right so, I'm Todd," the lanky man introduced himself, you could tell he was a stoner from the hipster beanie and his bloodshot eyes, however, Gene had to admire his taste in music.

"Nice shirt, Todd, I'm a David Bowie fan myself, " Gene said, which was an unusual thing to say to someone you'd just met instead of introducing yourself in return, but Gene was desperate for small talk.

"What, this ol' thing? I don't even listen to David Bowie, I just borrowed this shirt from my brother back in high school because I had nothing to wear and – well, forgot to return it," Todd chuckled.

Gene sighed, did he have anything in common with these people?

"Anyways, so this is the _gang:_ Lana, Violet, Simon and Blake," Todd said as he pointed to each housemate.

"Right, well, hi, I'm Gene," Gene mumbled, he could feel their judgmental eyes glaring daggers through him.

"Well then, Violet, do you mind giving Gene here a bit of a house tour?" Todd suggests, as he plumped himself onto the couch.

"Why does it have to be me?" Violet whined.

"Just do it Vi, it's not that big of a deal, besides, it's your turn," Blake scoffed.

Violet groaned, as she stood up and approached the now nervous Gene.

Violet was quite intimidating appearance wise, with a face covered in piercings, bright purple hair, and a dog collar. She looked like an immature thirteen-year-old trying too hard to piss off her parents, except she never grew out of her phrase and continued the edgy persona during her college years.

"Follow me, _lard-ass_ ," she sniggered.

Gene always hated painful jabs at his weight, then again, he realized he was being quite hypocritical considering he just judged her for the way she chooses to dress. Brushing it off he followed the young woman down the hallway, anxious to see what his new room looked like.

 **Tina:**

"Alright, Tina, and what do you consider to be your most significant quality that can be used to better our company?" the employer questioned.

" _Uhhhhh…_ "

"Tina?"

" _Uhhhhh…_ "

"Tina, is everything okay?"

" _Uhhhhhhhh…_ "

There it was, that signature groan that has ruined every job interview so far. Tina already knew that this was another rejection waiting to happen. Yet she couldn't stop, whenever she was nervous and had nothing to say, a huge, monotone groan escapes her voice box and doesn't stop until everyone talking to her has successfully been weirded out.

No matter what she does she just can't control it. It's like in books, when the main character sees something terrifying and they want to run away from it, but they tense up and describe their legs feeling like jelly – well that's what it's like when talking. Whenever Tina's stressed out, but needs to inform someone about something important, nothing can be spoken except that dull, confused groan. She was never going to get a job at this rate.

Finally It stopped, Tina glanced back at her employer's disapproving features then quickly to the floor.

"Miss Belcher, you've yet to answer the question," the employer reminded her.

"I – I don't know," Tina sputtered.

 _I don't know –_ possibly the worst answer one can give to a job interview question. At this point Tina understood that she had certainly failed.

"Alright, uhm… tell me about -" the employer began her next question, but was cut off due to Tina getting out of her seat.

"Miss Belcher, please sit down, we're not finished… Miss Belcher? Miss Belcher!"

Tina ignored the agitated woman and speed-walked out of the building, not looking back.

 _Great, yet another embarrassing moment that will haunt me forever, I'll be sure to add it to my list of regret,_ Tina thought to herself as she began her walk home.

By that time the sun was setting, the sky was painted an array of pink, orange and yellow, and the pale glow of the moon was beginning to show. It was a beautiful sight, but it only meant that darkness followed, and Tina didn't want to be walking alone at night. She began to speed walk, as she couldn't deal with that sort of paranoia at the moment with all the other shit going on with her life.

Unfortunately, she had thought too soon, because that odd feeling washed over her – that feeling you get as though you're being followed – it's not a safe feeling, that's for sure. Which is why Tina decided to pick up her pace.


	2. Chapter 2 (Louise)

This is not how Louise intended to spend her evening, holding Jessica's floppy, ginger hair behind her back whilst she proceeded to throw up in a public toilet.

"Oh yes Jessica, I'm feeling the freedom now. You seem to be having fun there too, damn, you showed me," Louise teased, sarcastically.

"You know what – fuck you," Jessica managed to say between gargles. She hurled up the last of her bile before shrugging Louise off and standing up.

"You know; my whole life it's been all about you. I wanted to stay inside, you wanted to go on some ridiculous misadventure, guess which one we'd do. We always had to do what you wanted to do," Jessica slurred, but you could tell she meant it from the tears welling up in her eyes. The furious girl exited the stall and leaned over one of the sinks, turning the faucet, she began splashing her face with handfuls of water. Louise watched, unmoved.

"Jessica, I-"

"No, you shut up and listen for once, Louise. Never once did you think about me. I was like a charity service to you. _Oh look at Louise, hanging around boring Jessica, what a kind thing for her to do._ _Oh look at Louise, not telling the class about Jessica's late bed-wetting issues, isn't she a Saint._ Well no – I know you've done a lot of nice things for me in the past – but the truth is it was all to feed your inflated ego!" Jessica was seething now, it seemed as if she had been repressing that for a while. She turned the faucet off and pivoted to face her so-called 'friend'.

"Jessica, you-" Louise tried to explain only to be cut off again.

"I don't need your excuses, Louise. You've always said that the reason you force me to do these things with you is because you want me to be outgoing, and now that I am more outgoing you've done nothing but complain, I was happy tonight. Sure I may be vomiting up my insides, but I don't care, it was worth it. You know, I hated high school, it may have been a walk in the park for you, but it certainly wasn't for me. I had people picking on me everywhere I went – even you, my only friend, made little jabs at me every now and again. You've been slowing grinding down my self esteem, and I'm sick of it!"

"Jessica, plea-"

"Let me guess, you're sorry, well I don't think that's going to work, Louise," Jessica scoffed.

"No, I was just going to say – if you'd let me finish – Jessica, you've got a bit of barf on your chin," Louise chuckled, in her eyes it was meant to lighten the mood, but this only agitated Jessica further.

"Right, I guess that seals the deal, our friendship is clearly nothing but a joke to you, so goodbye Louise," the red-head scoffed, wiping the vomit from her chin and flinging her purse over her shoulder.

"Ahh, come on, I was only kidding," Louise laughed, though clearly Jessica wasn't having any of it.

Louise watched helplessly as her only actual friend stormed out of the bathroom and out of sight. Figuring she'd gone back to partying Louise remained perfectly calm.

"She'll come round by the end of the night, she's probably just a bit of an angry drunk," Louise reassured herself, staring at her reflection in the bathroom mirror.

"You know, talking to yourself is often seen as one of the first signs of madness," a familiar voice informed, a voice Louise knew all too well.

"Jesus Christ, Millie, how long have you been in here?"

"Long enough, I heard the entire argument, I figured now that Jessica is out of the picture, you should start looking for other friends," Millie enthused.

"No Millie, leave me alone," Louise sighed, knowing what direction the conversation was headed.

Millie Frock seemed like your typical, innocent frizzy haired girl, but the truth was she was insane. She had been obsessed with Louise since fourth grade, perhaps even longer, doing things such as locking Louise in a box fort for the duration of Halloween for refusing to trick or treat with her, or even running for school president just so she could make a buddy system that forced the two of them together. Recently, Louise had discovered that Millie had been collecting snippets of her hair over the years and storing them within a sandwich bag inside her locker.

It was best to avoid Millie for the most part.

"Hey, Louise, remember: When I say Lou, you say…" Mille began that annoying chant once again. The chant she had tried to involve Louise in for years. Louise proceeded to ignore her and head for the bathroom exit but Millie persisted to block her path.

"Move, Millie," Louise demanded, only becoming more fed up.

"No, you're meant to finish the chant with –ise, so when put together it makes Louise, here let's try again. When I say Lou, you say…"

Louise knew she just had to give in to Millie's little incantation, otherwise Millie might resort to extremes – or just refuse to let her leave the bathroom. You could never really predict what someone like Millie would do when agitated.

Louise unenthusiastically added the " _Ise_."

"Louise!" Millie cheered, finally stepping aside, her eyes glued to the Belcher girl as she passed.

"Goodbye, _Lou Lou_ , nice running into you."

"Uhm, yeah, bye Millie… and don't call me _Lou Lou,_ " Louise mumbled, practically sprinting out of the bathroom, only once again to be engulfed in meaningless party music.

Normally Louise would be perfectly content with partying, but it was one of those nights where she'd rather not be surrounded by hundreds of strangers. She tried to find Jessica, to maybe make amends, but she was nowhere to be seen, so Louise decided to just leave by herself. Jessica was normally the one to sort out transportation, and Louise had foolishly left her phone at home on charge, so she had no other choice but to walk.

She didn't know what time it was but the sky was pitch black. The only thing illuminating the sidewalks were the dim fluttering lampposts and a few passing cars' headlights. There weren't any others around except for a hungry stray cat. All the stores were already closed and it gave the town an empty feeling. Louise trudged home with nothing but her own company, she quite enjoyed the peace and quiet as she didn't get to experience it often.

However, of course this 'peace' was short lived as a motorcycle ripped around the corner, it's engine roaring with it's classic deep thrum, like a huge insect. It sped toward Louise, sleek and black and screeched to a halt right in front of her. Louise knew from the jacket that this was a member of the One Eyed Snakes, a motorcycle gang that later became friends of the family through the service of their restaurant.

"Critter, is that you? Could you give me a ride back to the restaurant?" Louise asked.

The motorcycle rider lifted the visor on his helmet, revealing a familiar face. Louise was getting sick of reuniting with her old nemeses. First Mille, now this. Then again, it was a small neighborhood.

"What the heck, Logan?" Louise exclaimed. She was absolutely baffled, not about seeing Logan, but about the One Eyed Snake clan letting his wannabe-ass into their gang, especially after they almost cut his ear off eight years ago (under Louise's command of course.

"Get on, four-ears," Logan snickered as he tossed his spare helmet, which Louise caught in her stomach.

"But-"

"Are you gonna get on, or should I just leave you to walk home?" Logan threatened.

He made a fair point. Louise jumped onto the back of the motorcycle behind Logan, and pulled her helmet on as Logan hit the throttle.

The bike leapt down the street, Louise watched in amazement as the buildings and lots sped by, instinctually wrapping her arms around Logan's upper torso to ensure she didn't fall off the back of the bike.

Louise had to admit, she always had a thing for… motorcycles.


End file.
